The time he got rejected, HARD… (story inside)

How amazing are you feeling right now?

Let’s talk about something that is very interesting to me… And its the IDEA of “rejection”

Have you ever been rejected?

I had a girl the other day describing her job to me…

She was talking about how her job entails making 100 cold calls per day, and her job requires a the kind of person who “knows how to deal with rejection.”

…as if she was there was something that made her this Super Human who could handle rejection better than anyone else.

Here’s my take on this R word… It doesn’t exist.

The truth is, “rejection” is completely based on your perception of a certain situation.

Think about it…

Imagine this, you’re sitting in a cafe, minding your own business, and this group of girls walk by…

As all of these girls walk by, you notice that they all look at you and smile…

What is your interpretation of this?

Half of the guys who just read that situation thought 1 of 2 things.

1. The girls smiled at you because there was something wrong with you or your appearance.

You might not know what it is, but for some reason they were all making fun of you inside of their own heads.

And for the rest of the day, you’re going to walk around feeling like there is something wrong with you simply because those girls smiled when they saw you.

This low vibrational energy would have rubbed off on others, and you likely wouldn’t have had very many positive interactions that day.

On the other hand, some guys probably thought this…

2. The girls smiled at you because they were all clearly attracted to you.

You concluded, “Of course they’ll smile when they see me. I look good.”

And if you didn’t go up and grace those girls with your presence, you would have walked through the rest of your day with a high self-esteem.

That positive energy would have rubbed off on everyone.

People would have been starting conversations with you, and they would have loved talking to you.

You probably would have made a new friend or two, and maybe even gotten a few girls numbers.

What was the difference in those 2 situations?

The only difference was your consciously chosen interpretation of girls smiling on you.

No matter what happens to you throughout your day, you can either choose to see it in a positive light, or a negative light.

There are 360 degrees of interpretation for you.

So funny story…

I have a buddy here in Scottsdale, AZ who is one of those “pick-up artists” and he spends every lunch break of his hanging out at Whole Foods.

[For those of you reading this right now who are in another country, whole foods is where all the hot women buy groceries…]

And every day while he’s there, he walks around until he finds a really attractive girl to “approach”…

Here’s where it gets good…

He said when he first started doing this, half of the time these super hot girls would talk to him, and they’d exchange phone numbers. Whereas the other half would be very stand-offish, and they wouldn’t even make eye contact with him.

At first he would always take this as the girls “rejecting” him…

After doing this many, many, many times he realized something…

The girls who didn’t give him the time of day actually had boyfriends.

He realized this because he got so good at reading attraction cues from girls that he realized, yes these girls actually liked him, but for some reason they just wouldn’t let themselves open up to him.

Eventually he just started blatantly saying, “You have a boyfriend don’t you?” With them always saying “Yes.” 

[Now if they actually had a boyfriend is a different story for a different day… but quit getting me off topic]

So what’s the message here?

Before, when my buddy thought these girls were “rejecting” him, he let it affect him and his mood.

It would then carry on into every interaction he had after that.

But when he realized that these girls weren’t “rejecting” him, and that they were actually just not giving themselves the permission to talk to him because they weren’t single, everything changed.

It no longer affected his state.

He quit beating himself up because of this fake idea of “rejection”.

And his results in every area of his life skyrocketed.

So what’s the takeaway for you from this blog post?

Here’s what it is in a nutshell…

First off, quit beating yourself up for your perceived “failures” in your life… Those have nothing to do with who you are as a person.

You’re either a winner, or a loser.

Winners don’t let a single loss hold them back from winning the championship title at the end of the season — losers do.

And the choice is yours.

Obviously you read Social Swagger Daily, so in MY eyes you’re a winner. But like I said, the choice is yours.

And second, “rejection” does not exist. There is only reference experience.

If something that you wanted to work out doesn’t work out, then you just found another way to not do something. Which is good because now you’ll know one more thing to NOT do in the future when you want a similar outcome.

Thomas Edison, who invented the lightbulb said this, “I have not failed, I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.” –Thomas Edison

Finally, quit being a story finisher.

I can’t tell you how many times [because it happens so often] where I’ll think “Ok, I guess that thing just didn’t work out…” Only to have it actually happen the next day, or sometime in the near future.

So if a girl doesn’t text you back for a week, don’t get dejected and think it’s over…

Trust that the dots will connect soon.

Something amazing happens when you always believe in yourself, and trust that the dots will connect… Things happen to start going your way.

I don’t know why. It’s just one of those mysterious laws of the universe.

That said, go out and enjoy your Friday night man.

-Patrick

P.S. Even after I learned that “rejection” is just an interpretation, and that I could consciously choose to see it as a positive reference…

I still struggled with being a story finisher.

Think about it right now… What stories have you finished in your own narrative called life?

Do you have one of those sob stories of “the one who got away”?

Did you get turned down for your dream job?

Did the school you wanted to go to send you one of those pieces of paper that said “no”?

Take a second to be grateful for what you’ve got in your life today, and then trust that you’ve got AWESOMENESS awaiting you in the future.

Peace out.

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